Beyond the Pain

I’m not sure if this is true… but I’m hoping it is.

I’ve been struggling with severe, incapaciating pain for the last 2 months.

Some things I conciously did, like neurotherapy for my fibromyalgia, worked — that is, they helped reduce or eliminate the pain.

But what’s been really crazy making  is that one day or even for several days I could be pain free and then BLAM! For no apparent reason I’d have several days of killing pain.

And, I wouldn’t know what made the difference.

Must be that need for control.

Anyway, recently I made the following comment in an email to my coach, "It seems like the days on which I have no goal or purpose are the worst."

I got thinking about that.

And, when I was in real pain at bed time I decided to set  a purpose for myself for the following day. Not a big, humunguos purpose. Just a commitment that I would spent a couple of hours writing about what I might do to build my coaching practice.

And, the next day I woke up pain free.

Now, this is ONLY 1 day we’re talking about so far. But, I’m hopeful… gotta be!

What if this is one of the  keys to pain freedom?

Then purpose really would be a healing thing.

I’ll keep you posted.

In Jr. High we had a quirky little English  teacher.  He was a fussy, little bird of a man, flitting around the classroom like a Sandpiper. Pausing for moments to glance over one’s shoulder then skittering to the next student.

I still remember his detailed description of how to build a proper compost
heap: carefully place each item in it’s ‘correct’ spot, layer orange peels
and cabbage leaves just so, carefully pile on potato peelings, add a dash of coffee grounds for drainage — and
colour. Weird, the things that stick with you (that was more than 40 years ago).

It was he who introduced me to T. S. Eliot’s The Hollow Men with it prophetic pronouncement that the world would end "not with a bang but with a whimper!"

And, that’s another piece of trivia that has stayed with me over the years.

I’m glad it has. Because its a fitting way to describe the death of pain.

I’ve lived with grinding, crushing, excruciating pain over the last 4 years. And, now except for occasional flare ups that happen when lack of sleep meets tumultous weather, I have no pain.

And, it left with no fanfare. No bugles or trumpets. No sirens wailing.

It left with no bang. But, with a whimper.

Tags: pain relief