Beyond the Pain

Does this happen to you?

You get so fixated on working toward a goal that you don’t acknowledge or notice the progress you’ve made.

Happens to me all the time. I could blame my perfectionism, which would be true to a degree. Or, I could blame being overly focused on the goal, which would be true to a degree. Or, I could blame it on not having marker points in my plan, which would be true in large measure.

You see when I set out to go Beyond The Pain I didn’t have a plan. I just found the first thing that made sense to me and tried it. And, then when that didn’t work I thought about what I’d learned and tried the next thing, and the next thing, and the nexdrt thing. I tried some pretty weird treatments, lots of pills, and a boatload of psychological treatment. At the same time I kept scrupulous records of weather, stress, and what now. I’ve since learned that keeping medication, pain, and other records is a keystone of the Self Management program at the Calgary Pain Centre. Good on me!

In the Spring of this year I confirmed something I’d long suspected. It wasn’t just changes in air pressure that triggered my pain. It was changes in air pressure coupled with temperature changes and alterations in wind speed, particularly wind gusts. Since I couldn’t do much about the weather, except dress up or down, I turned my attention to what I could control.

I determined five natural or mind-based strategies I would use in my research. Then I devised a spread sheet I would use to record details of the pain management strategies and whether they worked. The pain continued at a severely fairly constant level through out the summer. Then in August, based on non pain based symptoms I was experiencing I began to suspect that a medication my urologist prescribed for BPH was the maincause of pain. I would not have known that if I didn’t keep detailed records of all the symptoms I was experiencing.

I stopped the medication and informed the urologist I had done so. Within a week I was pain free and I enjoyed a September mainly free from pain. Then October arrived with tumoltous cold weather. And, I was back to early morning pain.

And, failed to notice something rather important.

Yesterday I went to my former therapist, Lynn Lambert, to address concerns I had about Post Traumatic Stress arisng from my car crash. When I discussed the progress I had made with Dialing Down The Pain she said something that suprized me.

She said, “Wow! That’s fantastic. You’ve found something that works most of the time for pain.”

We went on discuss the things I tried and what I had been like.

And, I got it.

This is stellar progress. It really is significant. I’ve arrived at a critical point. I need to acknowlege it.

One way of acknowledging it is this blog post. I need to ponder what I am going to do.

Thanks Lynn for helping me see what I wasn’t seeing.

What do you call a project that is 365 days late and $ 300,000 over budget? A typical systems project.

When I was a Systems Analyst — Yes Virginia, I got IT skills — at Imperial Oil Limited (Exxon North) we faithfully followed the Pied Piper of Project Management so we could avoid becoming victims of the Ninety-Ninety Rule.  

That’s where I find myself today. How do I mark THE END? Afterall, I optimistaclly/foolishly thought I’d be finished my recovery by August of 2011.

That’s why I have decided that my next birthday, which marks the 3rd anniversary of my car crash, will mark the official end of my recovery.

Yes, I KNOW … Dr. Shelagh Coutts, the trauma neurologist assigned to my case, said, “Lyle you will keep on recovering brain function.” And, Dr. Richard Buckley, MD, Head of Trauma Surgery, said, “Your ankle basically works. But, it can be improved. You can either get orthotics for your ankle or I can operate.” I chose the orthotics because I was afraid not of the surgery but of the bloody recovery process. So, I still limp but the ankle WORKS.

Yes, my PTSD is still affecting me but it’s much less severe thanks to EMDR treatments from Hypnotherapist, Lynn Lambert, MSW, RSW. And, for the foreseeable future I will be meeting with my therapy team — Dr. Lawrence Marcus, MD,  Psychiatrist and Laura Siewick, Registered Psychologist — of the NW Community Mental Health service. Finally, I’m likely to ‘graduate’ from the Calgary Pain Centre by next September.

So, how will I mark this significant occasion? Together with my family, likely the weekend of the Canadian Thanksgiving.

We intend to hike somewhere in Kananskis Country but I know not where. The flooding in June 2013 washed out a number of bridges. We may have to go elsewhere.  Fortunately, Southern Alberta is blessed with many hiking trails.

I’m thinking about what I want to do.

Any suggestions for me as to how I can memorialize my recovery? Best suggestion wins 1 hour of Spiritual Life Coaching.